MENTORING TOASTMASTERS

We often come across terms like examiner-examinee, trainer-trainee, assessor-assessee, coacher-coachee & mentor-mentee. In these pair of words the former is the origin of an action and the later is an end to an action. These actions are known as examining, training, assessing, coaching and mentoring respectively.Mentoring is a means of providing help, guidance, and support to other persons who are often younger or less experienced. It is a role rather than a profession. A mentor is a volunteer role model, or a leader who is committed and consistent in his or her helping relationship with the other party who is usually a student or co-worker. Unlike teachers or advisors, mentors often share a personal relationship with their mentees.

In a Toastmasters club the moment a member is inducted, he is formally assigned a mentor. A careful study of the Competent Communication Manual reveals the nature of each project. These projects can be broadly classified into “Planning Project” and “Execution Projects”.

Project:1 Ice Breaker,focuses on “Execution” (A person in the first attempt is required to face the audience), Project:2 Organize your speech, focuses on “Planning” (It needs to have a structure, namely an opening, a body and a conclusion interwoven with appropriate transition), Project:3 Getting to the point, focuses on “Planning” (The project need to have a general purpose and a specific purpose), Project:4 How to say,focuses on “Planning” (It is all about choosing proper words and framing proper and easily understandable sentences), Project:5 Your body speaks, focuses on “Execution” (It is all about of putting eye gesture, facial expression and body movement to use), Project:6 Vocal variety, focuses on “Execution” (It deals with putting voice, volume, pitch and rate to create desired effect), Project:7 Research your topic focuses on “Planning” (It deals with collecting information from different source and aligning them to support your point and opinion), Project:8 Get comfortable with visual aids, focuses on “Execution” (It deals with getting used to handling different visual aids), Project:9 Persuade with power, focuses on both “Planning and Execution” (It deals with analyzing the audience and appealing to their interest using carefully chosen words, logic and emotions through body language and vocal variety), Project:10 Inspire your audience , focuses on both “Planning and Execution” (This project intends to inspire the audience personally, professionally, emotionally, spiritually, in a mood of fellowship and shared interest aided by emotion, drama and stories to move to the next higher level)

Out of the 10 projects 4 projects focuses on planning, 4 on execution and 2 on a mix of planning and execution. The mentor has a broader scope and more freedom to work in the planning projects to help his mentee gain more ground but in the execution project he has limited liberty of just guiding. It all depends on the learning and adapting ability of the mentee. While monitoring the progress of the mentee a mentor in his wisdom should exert more leverage on the planning projects and skillfully guide through the execution projects. In the final two projects he should advise and suggest only where needed and allow his mentee to walk and work alone and erect.

If the mentor on one hand doesn't bother getting bothered while bothering his mentee and if the mentee on the other hand doesn't bother being bothered completing his Competent Communication Manual, I think he is ready to take up the Advance Communication track and complete it hassle-free.  

MENTORING AS I SAW

The affinity of sodium to oxygen is such that if put in water it spontaneously combines with oxygen in the molecule of water. Carbon needs heat to combine with oxygen. Some elements need pressure and some need a catalyst for the reaction to happen. The inert elements never react. Reaction is all about forming a bond; it may be strong or weak. 

On the first day as a guest at the Elite Toastmasters Club I found Toastmasters a better platform to express ideas. I enter Toastmasters for two reasons, firstly for creativity secondly to hone my speaking skill. In the Toastmasters a members is formally assigned a mentor. Soon came the contest, I participated and lost. Having put in the best of my learning when the results don’t come through, it means I missed somewhere. I tried to understand reasons related to my failure through paying a visit to many senior Toastmasters, but in vain.

Not losing hope, I continued to learn. This learning started reflecting while I was on the podium and, then started coming, the assignment on mentoring; mentoring Youth Leaders and club members.

In jobbing it is the same raw material with a given specification on which a repetitive processing is done to get a predetermined product of desired specification.

In mentoring it is not so; every time you get a mentee with a different specification it can be: a boy, a girl, a man, a woman, adventurous, non-adventurous, receptive to ideas, partially receptive to ideas, married, bachelor and so on and so forth. All these specification help one to build a mentoring plan. For a club member a mentor also needs to look at why is he in for and whether he would prefer fast track, a medium paced track or a slow track.

Having set a plan, then comes its execution. Sincerity in execution sets the mentor- mentee relation in good tone. Mentoring is different from taking a lecture of mathematics, physics, chemistry or zoology. It always demands creativity, something new always. This is what keeps the mentee glued with you. He starts enjoying being with you, learning from you; on the other hand the you too get enriched. A mentor is able to see his mentee shaping up. It does not necessary imply that the mentee also sees the same.  

It is with this wisdom that I had to push a mentee through the contest. The aftermath of the contest left him with no words. He was holding a trophy in his hand. The mentor sees what the mentee does not see. One more similar incident did take place with a different mentee. A mentee sees inability, a mentor sees ability. It is a paradigm shift in perception.

At times a mentor is required to work on other end to get things done on this end; that brings in sound connectivity and induces confidence in the relationship.

A teacher teaches, a trainer trains, a coach coaches and a doctor dispenses but a mentor walks an extra mile. Mentoring is a relation which starts on a simple note but doesn't end, but doesn't die; once a mentor, always a mentor. Mentoring is all about creating affinity for learning, up keeping affinity for learning.

Mentoring a spectrum of people ranging from teachers to students (college and school) and industrial to non-industrial employees has been a rewarding experience for me.

THE STORY OF SAMINA MAZHER

“Love my love, where are you?" was my biggest flop speech. The audience understood all other aspect of the speech except the aspect that I wanted them to understand. The central character of the speech is a lady in “VEIL”. The veil in the speech epitomizes separation of two personalities. Close on the heels of an apparent personality there exists a hidden personality which goes unnoticed. More often, there is more than what appears to the eyes; it may be appealing, interesting and appreciable.

While the periodic table was being worked upon and elements were being randomly discovered; at times a gap between two elements would predict a missing element.

My flop speech too; was a prediction, which rose from the depth of my belief and Samina comes in as a befitting example to it. Far from being a woman entrepreneur, a teacher, a mother of a collegian son and a schooling daughter, the student in her is still alive.

2011, Area 63 contest provided an opportunity to work together; I was the chief judge and she the contest chair. It was a last minute assignment but she was not deterred instead committed to work it out and give her best. At the contest she performed flawlessly and the contest ended hassle free.

All around us we have deserving and nearly deserving persons; slight boosting, a bit of motivation, an ounce of encouragement aided with an opportunity would set them rolling on their path of success and progress. I am always on the hunt for such people and never miss an opportunity to offer an assignment and in line with this, once I offered to help her complete her communication manual.

Unaware of her priorities I kept on pursuing from time to time. It was only around Nov 2013 that she was comfortable setting out time for herself to the extent of 06 hours per week. I too, was hard pressed with time. We both were optimistic and we started with CC-04, developing the speech in line with the objectives of the project and then rehearsing on it. She mused working with words, feeling the spirit behind the words and expressing her feelings.  As the project neared perfection of delivery I would start looking for speech slots in different clubs. Along with working on the project she had also to simultaneously be focused on the UCMAS ABACUS classes and the flow of events there. The preparation for those events would demand time, attentions, and energy on personal level and leadership skills while guiding her class instructors at the team level. Justice to the quantum of work that she dealt with would not have been possible without the caring and tireless support of her husband Mazher Hussain.

We were able to complete three projects, the fourth project was ready but work at the UCMAS ABACUS again demanded her attention. Practice sessions were yet to happen. Life is so; we strive to progress, life strives to regress; in time we experience a tug of war, sometimes a push and sometimes a pull. A series of such pushes and pulls makes what we call life. All such pushes and pulls provide us lessons to learn and paths to plan. To me, every click of the clock makes life beautiful and there is something new to learn, The few weeks spend in mentoring  Samina has strengthened my belief and given me joy of having done something constructive.

THE STORY OF SAMRIDH

When difficulties come; they come not single, they come in hordes. This saying turned out to be a reality for Venkat Devrajan, the chief coordinator of YLP. It is only the chief coordinator who bears the brunt when an unwanted or an undesired circumstance is encountered. Disregarding technical difficulties and resource shortfall, handling around 30 youth leaders is a challenging job. A job that can send one’s night sleepless and one’s stress escalated. Absence of a mentor increases one’s worries double fold. One more mentor had to leave the kingdom on emergency reasons. Time and tide wait for none; any shortage of resources hard or soft had to be met. A mentor had to be arranged for youth leader Samridh.

Apart from Toastmastering I and Venkat were good friends, I already had three mentees, but there was no other way left. I was asked to help Samridh; I consented.

Generally elders put big ideas and tall talks before the children. They forget that the person to whom they are talking is not big as they are, as big as them in experience, as big as them in thinking, as big as them in ideology. Every child is different and each one needs to be dealt differently. One can get a thing done from a child but the other child perhaps needs a different way to accomplish the same. Certain traits of person are inborn or habitual. Say for example accent, proper pronunciation is essentially important in the delivery of a speech. A slight variation can alter the meaning of an idea or can confuse the listener, one has very little control over it and overcoming it may require a long time. Accent has its roots in the family he belong to or to the region he is from.

The same day Samridh and his father visited me in the evening. He had brought along with him his speech. No sooner did we settled down he expressed that he didn’t like the speech, he didn’t enjoy the speech and it would be difficult for him to deliver that speech.

I asked “what is the thing that you like the most?”, he replied “Cricket”, I continued how if your speech starts with cricket that too with a climax scene. He immediately agreed. Leaving the speech with me the father and son went home wearing a smile, the father with satisfaction that his son’s worry was gone and the son with an assurance that I will be doing a speech of my liking. 

The next day we started rehearsing. I would explain him the pace of word, and the instance to raise and lower it, the emotion expressed by the pace. I also would explain him the importance of pauses in a speech and how they added value to the speech, instilled confidence in the speaker and casted an impression on the audience.

Some children involuntarily happen to be themselves, they would listen to you but when they perform you can’t see much difference in their later performance and the previous performance. It is not that they don’t want to but it simply doesn't happen. The best solution is to give time and work persistently. 

Samridh happened to be himself. Working with him, I liked his commitment and the contentment that he carried while he performed. He did complete his project successfully. Irrespective of the quantum of learning. I know all children learn but with varying pace. For me it was an opportunity for understanding Samridh.

THE STORY OF SREEJA

Learning, teaching and facilitating are the three phases of life and the same happens in the Toastmasters too. As a speaker you first learn the basic tools of communication, you implement them in the advance communication, teach them during evaluation and later on facilitate teaching by conducting a Youth Leadership Program or a Speech Craft Program. This is one of the requirements of the Advance Communication Gold and the person who conducts this program is the chief coordinator.

YLP is a series of 12 events spanning over 3 months being conducted every week and during these period come numerous problems, expected and unexpected. Some of them are manageable and some beyond ones control. Around 25 to 30 school children ranging from standard 8 to 12 are selected. There are approximately half the number of mentors who assist these children with their assignments. 

Youth Leadership Program is a very tight-scheduled program. A participant cannot afford missing a single session; Sreeja a youth leader had fallen sick and was diagnosed for chicken pox; she had missed 4 sessions but timely medical attention helped her recover soon and she wished to pursue the program. Venkat Devrajan the chief coordinator of the program was a worried man. Sreeja’s recovery was a point for him to rejoice but he had an equally opposite point to regret. Sreeja’s mentor had to leave the kingdom on an emergency leave; the big question was who would guide her? She required special attention and more guidance without further delay.

It was Friday afternoon, I received a call, Venkat was on the other end of the line. He continued: I have nothing to say but a request to make, can you help me out? I agreed. He asked if I could mentor one more child. I accepted. He explained me the case of Sreeja and expected me to act fast, he wanted me to reach him at his house and from there we together would visit her house.

Fifteen minutes later we were at Sreeja’s house, her family seated around hoping their daughter to get back in action. I was expected to help her with the International Speech. I asked if she had done some preparatory work on it. She replied in affirmation. Having talked with her to know her wish, hopes and commitment I asked her to send me the script. I would develop it and send it back to her. The next day we would be starting the rehearsal, by then she was asked to memorize it. 

That day, I worked till late in the evening and sent her the developed speech with a note to see her tomorrow evening at 05.00 pm. The next day at her home when we started the rehearsal, I found her facing difficulty in pronouncing certain words in the speech. Every person carries the dialect of his or her mother tongue. Very few are exceptions to it Sreeja too had the same problem. I decided to replace the tougher words with tougher words with softer words. I corrected the words and sent the speech to her.

The next day when I went to her house for the rehearsal, she continued with the tougher version. I asked her the reason. She simply said, she would prefer the tougher version. with everyday practice, the difficulty started disappearing and on the final day she made it; she was selected as the best speaker. Without bothering about the results all she knew was to believe in herself, believe in her mentor and give her best, the rest she left to GOD. See you next time with the STORY OF SAMRIDH. 

THE STORY OF AMATUL SAFI

It was May 2010, YLP mood at the Jubail Toastmasters Club. Venkat Devrajan was the Chief Coordinator. I was asked to mentor two children one of which was Amatul Safi the daughter of Mr. Mahmood and Mrs. Tahera Mahmood. Amatul had a younger brother who was a karate kid and his watchfulness seemed to me a trait of it. The family belonged to the state of Orissa in India.

As soon as the mentors were fixed, like every caring mother does, I received a call from Mrs. Tahera Mahmood so that the family could have a formal talk and get introduced with each other. Children are often shy when it comes to talking to a stranger and especially when it is a girl child. A girl child would always insist her mother to take the lead and set things right for her; the same was the case here. Mrs. Tahera, when she found that I was well versed with Hindi, she was happy for the reason that the communication during mentoring would not be a concern of worry.

The rendez-vous at their house started with a warm welcome. As we all settled down, Labeeb, Safi’s younger brother sat beside me. I gave them the primary explanation of what was Youth Leadership program. What were the phases Amatul we would be going through. There were four things to be done, first the ice-breaker speech, second the international speech, third the evaluation and lastly table topics.

The ice-breaker is a collection of memorable glimpses of one’s life. It is a self-introductory speech of 04 to 06 minutes. She did it well. Generally children find it easy to write about themselves but the real difficulty appears in writing an International speech; an international speech is a persuasive speech, a motivational speech or an inspirational speech.

One fine day I received a call from Mrs. Tahera asking me to help her out. As I inquired about the problem she told me that her daughter was complaining about not paying attention to her needs and that she preferred younger child Labeeb over her. Amatul wanted her mother to help her select a topic and a plot for the international speech; both were confused. I suggested why not consider the current scenario in the house for the speech content. I asked Amatul to write her feeling in whatever way she can. She eagerly wrote it and I meticulously developed it.

The story starts with a girl (Amatul) having preconceived thoughts, it revolves around an elderly character. At first she questions herself “What does a girl of 17 have in common with a man of 57?” she ignores this elderly figure who is her father’s friend whom she had never seen before. Few remarks from the elderly figure interests her and is drawn closer, later on she gets transformed and takes the right path. The story line was much closer to Amatul’s heart. I could she her best come out through her body language, command over English and well rehearsed delivery. She bagged the best speaker trophy. 

During the rehearsal Labeeb, Amatul's brother was a keen observer, and very much into it. He kept guessing about the elderly character (His father's friend); how come Amatul knows him and he doesn't? To quench his curiosity he surfed the net many times but couldn't get the answer. Unable to resist, he finally asked my "Who that person was?" I replied "it was me". The whole house bursted into laughter.

See you next time with THE STORY OF SREEJA.

THE STORY OF HEMA HAREESH

Giving surprises and getting surprised is predominantly the area of today’s youth. But it doesn't leave the elder generation away, they too have their share. My daughter loves to give me surprises. When my wife travels to Saudi Arabia, my daughter would send something with her and till the time my wife joins me in Jubail, she would keep me guessing. Some surprises emerge all of a sudden without a prior notice; some emerge with a notification and keep you guessing for a period of time. The curiosity ends when the surprise gets exposed. There is yet another type of surprise that happens and catches you unaware. The peculiarity is the curiosity doesn't end days, weeks and months after it’s exposed. One is just left to think, rethink, introspect and question oneself.

One fine morning during the week-end I received a call from Hareesh. He was asking me to join him for a cup of tea that afternoon. I asked him if there was anything special about the tea meeting. He denied.

Later in the afternoon I was at his place, received with a warm welcome. As we settled down in the sofa the children after sometime left for their room. Me and Hareesh were busy with casual talk while Hema was busy preparing the tea and snacks. She joined us few minutes later. It was a general talk and one of the subjects was Toastmasters. It was first time and quality time with Hareesh and his family. I do not remember much, having said something specific or having emphasized a point or two.

Few days later, Hareesh gave me a call asking me “How could you manage to convince her?” I asked “whom?” Of course, “Hema”. I again asked “Regarding what?” He said “About Joining Toastmasters”. I have been trying it since two to three months but was never successful and you did it effortlessly over a cup of tea. I am really surprised.

It was not only a surprise for him, it was a surprise for me too. Sometime in nature and society there are undercurrent, things and matter come together and start brewing, they continue to brew, waiting for a person or an event to culminate the entire thing or the process to a desired end. People say “You came and things happened” but the person in the scene has only one thing to say “To accept that, yes it happened”.

I unknowingly became her mentor; she would complete her project and send it to me for review.  I found her to be a good writer especially when it came to describing a place or an event. There used to be liveliness in it. She steadily marched on doing her competent communication projects. She also took up the assignment of being a target speaker on two occasions. I loved her sincerity. She was a very good listener. She would speak less and listen more. I am not aware if Hareesh has the same view. (Ha, ha, ha,) 

The toughest part for a mentor is to understand what his or her mentee expects from him or her. All mentees do not say it openly or may not be able to express it clearly.

She would do it the way she had written the speech. I did not understand than why she kept on sending me the speeches for reviewing. Recently I received a mail from Hareesh mentioning that she has taken up a job back home in India. and my mentoring clearly reflects in her day to day activity. I do not understand and I do not know in what way did I touch her? The more I try to understand mentoring, there remains still more to be understood abut it. Next time I will be there with the story of Youth Leader Amatul Safi.

IN SEARCH OF ONE, WHO…

How much is a + a? Asked my mathematics teacher. For a while I thought what kind of question is this? I thought is she OK?  Then I thought she might be joking. Few week later as the algebra class advanced, things turned from bad to worse. The other students in the class were quick on the answer generating waves of smiles on the teacher’s face but when it was my turn I generated waves of frowns on her faces. I was humiliated badly in front of the class.

I was lost in my own world badly wanting a savior, a savior who would make things easy for me, make things understandable for me. At times, I felt the world moving ahead of me and I was the only person left behind. Who would care for me? Who would share for me? I felt everybody had his own race to run. Why would somebody care for me? Why would somebody share with me?

Few persons who empathized did not know Algebra. But one of them said “After every night there is a sunrise” He was more confusing than the mathematics teacher.  My little mind could not understand as to why is this man talking about the sunrise when I want to know something about Algebra.

It was when an elderly person made it clear, I came to know that things would be solved and difficult times would not last long. Yes, it did happen, the school were about to close and the good news was my uncle staying in Mumbai was going to come and stay with us. It was a joyous reunion after a long lapse of time. Once I expressed my worry related to Algebra. He with a  smile said “It will be taken care of” That evening we set together. He started with simpler and easy things. The basic rules, the focus required when solving problems. Then slowly he would raise the level of difficulty in pace with the rise of my understanding. Days changed, difficulties changed and with it changed the insight. I started loving Algebra.

It doesn't only happen in school days, or it doesn't only happen in college days; it happens in later life too, it may happen when you take up an assignment, it is only after taking it up, you find that it is not your cup of tea. A thought may flash in your mind “Why did I take it?” You may at times even think of giving it up. This phase is a crucial and critical one which decides the fate of your success, the fate of your destiny.

All persons are not able to mend their ways through such difficult and troubling times and there rises a need of a mentor. A person knowledgeable enough, a person matured enough, a person with enough patience, a person with understanding and a person whose sole focus is to get you out of that situation in a way such that, thereafter you are able to walk on your own and work on your own.

Observation and experience of years reveals that everyone is in search of one, who… This label "Mentoring" is a series of experiences being a mentee and then a mentor, I hope it makes good reading.

See you next time with the story of Madhu Suraiya-1

THE STORY OF ANUPAMA SHETTY

Randomness is a game of chance. All games have rules but randomness doesn't have. Often relations emerge out of randomness. Temporary needs are met by randomly asking someone for help. It again remains a matter of chance that the person who helped never reappears or that meeting becomes the cause of a blissful acquaintance. It was out of randomness that a lady approached me and asked me to evaluate her speech even though she had a evaluator nominated for her speech. She was Anupama Shetty.

Few days later TM Makarand approached me asking to mentor her. I agreed and thus started the journey of mentoring her. She had already completed her fourth project and we were into the fifth project; a project dealing with body language. I had received her speech and I was required to edit and develop it. I asked her comfort level if the script ran through her college days. With the completed speech in her hands she had few hesitations about the characters in the script. She suggested few changes and thus the script was given final shape. This has helped me understand a lady mentee and her angle of perception. Finally during the speech delivery I couldn't see a mother of two daughter but a college girl at her best. She enlivened the script.

It was 2011-12 she had won at the Elite Toastmasters Club International Speech Contest and was going to represent her club at the area level. When the level of competition rises the energy, time and dedication of both mentor and the mentee also rises.

I had worked on the script opening it with a question; every line, every paragraph, every story and anecdote was made to direct towards a convincing conclusion answering the opening question made at the beginning of the speech.

It was time to start rehearsing, she might have thought that the script would have minor changes here and there. She confidently started off, after a while I stopped her saying “You are much away from the actual content of the script”. She took the script in her hand and having gone through it expressed her inability, she was of the opinion that it would be difficult for her to adapt to those changes.

It is at this juncture that the mentor role becomes important. I have been through many instances when it was time to perform and the mentee sank into depression and ignorance, unaware of his or her potentials and ability. It is the mentor who provides strength, hope and moral support. In the end they walked away with trophies. 

    

I told her don’t start judging yourself, leave that for me. As we practiced, line by line paragraph by paragraph I could see the confidence instilling in her, at time she would raise a question about appropriateness of a  particular word, the sense of a sentence. Sincerity paved the way to receive the trophy, she bagged the third prize.

She was a teacher at the International Indian School, Jubail but when need be and situation demanded the student in her would come alive. Once a student always a student, once a learner always a learner, back home in India she is doing Bachelors in Education. May the spirit and mettle of a student continue in her. Next time I will be there with the story of TM Hema Hareesh.

THE STORY OF SUDHAKAR DEVANGODI

Any action demands something and also does it reward something. If we look at walking, brisk walking demands will and energy and rewards us with toned up muscle and strengthened lungs. Walking is a solitary exercise where in the investor is you and the harvester is you. When something is done with people around, it tends to have different implications. When ability, knowledge, power and position moves to you, public eyes rolls on you. Many eyes watch you and many hearts expect from you.

My Competent Communication level happened to be a ZIP, ZAP, ZOOM, the Advance Communication Bronze another one and the Competent Leadership yet another one. Achievements proportionally raise expectancy. Toastmasters is no exception.

TM Makarand Palamwar, my club president approached me with a request. He wanted me to share my experience and groom two of the club members. One of them was TM Sudhakar Devangodi. We knew each other by name and face. We were not close to each other but this was an opportunity know each other well. I was then his mentor.

The first thing a doctor does to his patient is to observe him. The way he looks, the way he talks, the way he behaves, the way he expresses and the thing that he expects. Mentoring too seems to be an assignment no less than of a doctor; critical, delicate, difficult, demanding and delivering.

Some of the observation that I had made about Sudhakar were, he was less assertive, less expressive and his world lay hidden within him, less exposed to the outer world. I was lucky enough to reach the beauty of his inner world.

He was a complete family man, at times his daughters and wife would accompany him to the Toastmasters meeting. I could sense commitment in his action. He would sincerely and seriously follow any assignment given to him. At times he would come up with creative ideas and thoughts which were reflected in his speeches that he wrote. He was man with a good sense of humor. Such personalities at times need a gentle push to keep them going.

In a mentor mentee relation either the mentee calls the mentor or the mentor calls the mentee, who calls whom, is not important but the very essential thing is the call, in short “The show has to go on”.

At time I would give him a call, ask him about work at the office, health of family members and the last thing would be about his speech. I was never in a hurry. I would suggest him to write a paragraph or two depending upon his mood and time. For him the key to success was “Slow and steady wins the race”. He really made it. He completed his Competent Communicator-10 speech within the expected time frame. He really made me proud; he has given me an opportunity to understand him and unknowingly provided lessons on how to deal with persons of his nature and personality.

While doing the Competent Leadership manual there is one assignment of getting the feedback from one’s mentee. I called him to do it for me. He came to my house and did it. Having done it, he asked me “Why do you do mentoring this way?” I told him, I did not get you. He said “Why so seriously?” I did not reply him for the simple reason I did not have a reply. This question of his has helped me understand what it means to be serious and has showed the road that lay ahead on the path of mentoring. Next time I will be with another story, the story of TM Anupama Shetty. 

THE STORY OF DURGA DUTTA TRIPATHI

Cozily cuddled among lush green surrounding was a building, a building that nested many departments; Department of Journalism, Department of German Language, Department of Russian Language and Department of French Language. Moving clockwise next to it was the Department of History, adjacent to it was a slope with a way leading to Science Faculty, then the way leading to Department of Microbiology. Following it was the Chanchi Mehta Auditorium, close to it was the General Education Building, next to it were two hostel buildings and then the Library, besides it was the Cyber cafe for collegians. In the center of all these buildings lay the cricket ground.

Before and after the class we the French student would pass time chit chatting under the shady trees overlooking the entrance. Once my eyes fell on a young and eye-catching person, he was stylish, his accent native and language expressive, I asked my friend “Who he was?”. My friend replied “Durga Dutta Tripathi, section head of our department”

It was in the second year that I came in touch with him. It was an introductory meeting we exchanged views, thoughts, hobbies, likes and dislikes. It was just a matter of few weeks, we came closer. I told him that I have started expressing my thoughts in the form of couplets and I would be glad if you help me improve it. He happily agreed, whenever I approached him with a new work, he was there ready to receive it, correct it and comment on it, his company was encouraging and motivating. I would be there at the department’s office in his company, whenever I was free. He was a clean person, and would insist a person to work on the right thing and in the right way. He would talk about his school day, the way he commuted from his village to the school; he would also talk about his grandfather who was well versed with Sanskrit Language and a disciplinarian. The attribute of being disciplined was endowed to him by his grandfather.

We had become friends. When friendship matters more, all other things matter less.

        

The Diploma results were declared. I was sitting in the office with Durga Dutta Tripathi and Madhu Suraiya. They had jointly accepted me as a faculty to teach the students of Adult Education and Continuing Studies. When we three arrived at the classroom, Durga Dutta Tripathi advised me two thing.

1.   Never lie to your students.

2. When asked, if you don’t know a thing, accept it, work on it and explain it the next day.

With these sermons in mind, I started teaching. I would see that nobody was left out. I used to make it an interactive session. I gave them a feeling that you too can do it. My intention was to build bridges so that the traffic of teaching commutes over it smoothly. I remained successful. On the last day while parting few girls and boys tried to touch my feet. Never had I thought collegians to behave so in a college. That was an eye-opener for me. It left me with a question? “Do we teacher try to understand our students?”.

The honor and respect so gained was all because of his guidance. I didn't follow the hearsay, instead guided by his wisdom I tried to be honest.  I found “The world is not the way people say but it is the way we explore it. 

Next I will be there with the story of Sudhakar Devangodi.  

THE STORY OF MADHU SURAIYA-2

Level one ended fast and soon we were in level two. Level one was about learning and level two seemed to be about expressing. Nature is never silent, it is always expressive. Rivers reverberate, winds whisper, flowers bloom and babies blab. I too tried to express. The first expression came out in the form of a conversation between a child and a parent.

Parent: Did she (teacher) teach you to read?

Child: No.

Parent: Did she teach you to write?

Child: No.

Parent: Did she teach you grammar?

Child: No.

Parent: Than what did she teach you?

Child: She taught me to unfold myself

There were several other thoughts expressed during level two. Learning in level two was deeper and more involved. Every time I wrote a thought, I would take it to her for her suggestion. She used to appreciate it. She might have sensed the heat in me contributing to creative writing; so midway through level two, she once asked “Would you like to teach?” I without a second thought said “No”. She without any reaction agreed to my disagreement. Life and learning went on as usual, she would periodically, coolly and calmly pose the same question and I would repeat the same answer “No”. Finally level two was over. To sustain the momentum of learning I decided to do the diploma in French.

We were destined to be together. She was once again the faculty for Diploma. The same question appeared again. This time, not to hear the question again I replied “I can give it a thought after completion of diploma”. Time passes stealthily the way sand slips out of one’s hand. Exams were over, it was time to ease and relax.

It was long off; I was occupied with the thought “What after diploma?” The stillness broke when my cell phone rang up; she was on the other end saying “The diploma is over and …..” Fifteen minutes later as I entered the French Department office she and the Head of the department Durga Dutta Tripathi received me with a smile. Finally I was a visiting faculty to the Department of French.

I often search for “How and why caring relations happen?” but remain unsuccessful. She has been a beautiful person I have come across in life. She has come close to being a friend, a philosopher and a guide. We are now family friends but I do not forget to address her as “Madam”

Next time I will be there with the story of Durga Dutta Tripathi

THE STORY OF MADHU SURAIYA-1

At times life continues to be flat, life continues to be low; it is at this juncture a desire arises to attempt something new. A new thing is not easy to work on. It is a struggling phase with high hopes and no solution in sight. Randomness is the order of our existence, and in line with this randomness if someone pops ups and continues ever after, one feels happy and contented about his presence. He is referred to as mentor and the one being served is referred as mentee. Advancing stages of such a relationship are more rewarding and mentor is seen as a friend philosopher and guide. I too happened to come across such a person.

Working over the control panel year over year had made life monotonous and mundane. A desire of doing something new took me to the French Classes. Day one, there appeared Madhu Suraiya our French teacher; she started with a formal introduction of the course, benefits of learning French, career ahead and job opportunities; the class ended with French alphabets and counting numbers one to ten. The next day the course took full swings and continued so for all days to follow. French is never spoken as it is written and never written as it is spoken. Every passing day escalated my worries and lessened my grip on the subject. Slowly I started believing that French was not my cup of tea. For a while I would think that stooping over the panel was a more comfortable proposition then the desire to break the monotony.

At the home front my children Vinayak and Bhumika would eagerly wait for me. The moment I opened the door they would be there with their wide opened expecting eyes and book in their hands. Before I took up French I would regularly help them with their studies and care for the examination preparation. 

The next day after the class I walked up to Madhu Madam and told her my desire to leave the class forever. I explained her reasons. She insisted that I should continue and wait for fifteen more days. As days passed by we came closer to each other, learning and understanding French became much easier to the extent that in the end I cleared the first level with 87 %. This was not the result of the ability of grasping and reproducing but the result of the fine chemistry that resulted between a teacher and a student. Apart from the fine chemistry, I was equally able to devote time for my children; I could see the glow in their eyes for they too cleared their exams with flying colors. All is well that ends well; songs to be sung and celebration to be made. It was a joyous phase which often left me thinking how time changes a sorrowful tide into a joyful tide. I rode that tide but how did I do it is still a question unanswered. If I were to ask a flower “How did you transform from a bud to a flower?” Would it be in a position to answer? I think the answer would be “No”. Perhaps some questions do not have an answer or they are not required to be answered. See you next time with the concluding part of this story.